A therapist has revealed the five things you should keep in mind while in an argument with your partner – including that you are a team, and that life isn’t black and white.
Most recently, he shared a video to his 2.6 million followers detailing the most important things you should keep in mind so that an argument doesn’t cause a permanent rift between you and your beau.
According to the love specialist, you and your lover should work on having a clear line of communication instead of triggering each other while in a fight so that you can have a long-lasting romance.
Jeff Guenther, from Portland, Oregon, has revealed the five things you should keep in mind while in an argument with your partner
The therapist has become a viral sensation on TikTok for often sharing his expertise in the love and romance departments
Most recently, he shared a video to his 2.6 million followers detailing the most important things you should keep in mind in a fight – including that you are a team
Keep your relationship going strong! The five things to keep in mind when arguing with your partner
- You are a team
- Arguments come from a desire to create peace
- Life is not black and white
- Flexibility is crucial for a romance to strive
- Recognize your triggers
He captioned the clip, which amassed over 97,000 views, ‘Five important things to remember next time you get into a fight with your partner.’
The first thing the therapist said you should remember is that you are a ‘team.’
He said: ‘Remember that you are a team, it’s not all about me versus you.
‘If you are gearing up to win the argument, you’ve already missed the point.’
Next up, Jeff recommended you and your partner remember where arguments arise.
He noted that disagreements don’t arise from a want or need to stir up conflict, but rather a desire to create peace.
‘Arguments arise from a desire of peace, not a desire to make your partner feel awful,’ he said.
The therapist went on to explain that you and your beau should strive for harmony.
‘You’re both aiming for harmony so in the midst of conflict strive to communicate, understand and grow together rather than focusing on the disagreement itself,’ he explained.
For his third tip, the love specialist said you should keep in mind that life is not ‘black and white.’
Next up, Jeff recommended you and your partner remember where arguments arise from
For his third tip, he noted that you should remember life isn’t black and white, and that the both of you should remember things aren’t black and white
‘It’s full of shades of gray, things are nuanced and layered. There’s no single right way to say things.
‘Both of your emotional experiences are valid and need to be honored equally,’ he explained.
The fourth thing you should never forget, according to the love expert, is that flexibility is crucial for things to work.
He said that if you and your beau aren’t willing to compromise, then the relationship will never last.
‘Flexibility is crucial for any relationship to work, you’re into your sweetie right, you want them to feel good.
‘So instead of fighting, ask yourself what you are willing to adjust to keep your partner happy and secure,’ therapy Jeff said.
The fourth thing you should never forget, according to the love expert, is that flexibility is crucial for things to work
The last thing the therapist said you should remember is how to recognize your triggers
The last thing the therapist said you should remember is how to recognize your triggers.
Jeff said that by knowing whether or not you are mad, you can better respond to your partner.
If you know your weaknesses, you can approach the argument with more love than you would have if you weren’t able to recognize them.
‘You’re either triggered or your not. When you’re triggered, you’re defensive and scared, and when you’re not, you’re warm and loving.
‘So what do you need to both do to avoid feeling feeling triggered,’ he added.