Lucy Letby wrote a ‘confession’ in which she described herself as a ‘horrible evil person’ and said: ‘I DID THIS.’

The note was discovered in her diary by police when they raided her home following her arrest.

On the green Post-it, found in a 2016 diary in her bedroom, she wrote: ‘I killed them on purpose because I’m not good enough. I will never have children or marry or know what it’s like to have a family.’

Other strange and chaotic writings were also recovered from her handbag and garage.

She insisted that the green note was not evidence that she had killed and harmed the children, but that she had written it when she was ‘struggling’ mentally because she thought she could have made mistakes at work and had accidentally hurt the babies.

But the jury dismissed her claims and agreed with the prosecution that it should be read ‘literally.’

Last night handwriting expert Adam Brand, who analysed Letby’s notes for the Mail, said her writing style was evidence of a ‘manipulative and dishonest’ individual.

Homicidal nurse Lucy Letby wrote a 'confession' in which she described herself as a 'horrible evil person' in a series of handwritten notes found after she went on a killing spree

Homicidal nurse Lucy Letby wrote a ‘confession’ in which she described herself as a ‘horrible evil person’ in a series of handwritten notes found after she went on a killing spree

In one 'confession' in which she described herself as an 'awful person' before writing 'I AM EVIL I DID THIS' (pictured)

In one ‘confession’ in which she described herself as an ‘awful person’ before writing ‘I AM EVIL I DID THIS’ (pictured)

In other notes seized by police, Letby had written 'hate my life', 'can't do this anymore' and 'HELP'

In other notes seized by police, Letby had written ‘hate my life’, ‘can’t do this anymore’ and ‘HELP’

Handwriting expert Adam Brand, who analysed Letby's notes for the Mail, said her writing style was evidence of a 'manipulative and dishonest' individual. In this, he breaks down what her writing represents

Handwriting expert Adam Brand, who analysed Letby’s notes for the Mail, said her writing style was evidence of a ‘manipulative and dishonest’ individual. In this, he breaks down what her writing represents

Other features of her handwriting, however, indicated she could also be ‘charming’ and ‘kind’ at the same time, he said.

Mr Brand said Letby was a fascinating case because her writing style displayed traits of antisocial behaviour disorder – impulsiveness, dishonesty, rejection of discipline and manipulation – while it also showed she was capable of ‘integrating’ into society and making friends.

He said the handwriting in Letby’s 2016 diary, which was recovered by police, was ordered and appeared to be written by someone in control. But it was in great contrast to the other coloured notes, which were all shown to the jury and appeared to be much more chaotic and disturbed.

‘Her writing shows she is a charming person who can do some terrible deeds,’ he said.

Mr Brand likened Letby to Jeffrey Dahmer, the US serial killer who murdered and dismembered 17 men over 13 years in Milwaukee, USA.

‘He has been described as an integrated anti-social and I see her like that,’ he said. ‘She is somebody who can occasionally be very friendly, other times manipulative, secretive and cold.’

Mr Brand highlighted several ‘disturbances’ in her handwriting style.

The way she had written HATE, PANIC, FEAR, LOST on the green ‘I am evil’ note could be viewed as attention seeking, it suggested she wanted to be listened to and not ignored, he said.

While the ‘continuous loopings’ on the yellow note and repetition of her name or signature on the white A4 note, both showed she was obsessive, Mr Brand said.

The way her writing does not slant one way or the other – it doesn’t lean to the right or the left consistently but has a varying slant – and sometimes ‘suddenly’ changes direction in the middle of a word, is highly unusual and demonstrates she suffered ‘horrific’ mood swings and had difficulty fitting into a team, Mr Brand said.

Last night handwriting expert Adam Brand, who analysed Letby's notes for the Mail, said her writing style was evidence of a 'manipulative and dishonest' individual

Last night handwriting expert Adam Brand, who analysed Letby’s notes for the Mail, said her writing style was evidence of a ‘manipulative and dishonest’ individual

He said the handwriting in Letby's 2016 diary, which was recovered by police, was ordered and appeared to be written by someone in control.

He said the handwriting in Letby’s 2016 diary, which was recovered by police, was ordered and appeared to be written by someone in control.

Mr Brand likened Letby to Jeffrey Dahmer, the US serial killer who murdered and dismembered 17 men over 13 years in Milwaukee, USA.

Mr Brand likened Letby to Jeffrey Dahmer, the US serial killer who murdered and dismembered 17 men over 13 years in Milwaukee, USA.

Police recovered a series of scrawled notes that Letby wrote during her killing spree

Police recovered a series of scrawled notes that Letby wrote during her killing spree 

On other notes she wrote 'I can't do this anymore' and 'everything is manageable'

On other notes she wrote ‘I can’t do this anymore’ and ‘everything is manageable’ 

‘Mood swings are shown by sudden changes of slant, you go from left slant to right slant,’ Mr Brand said.

Life of ‘vanilla killer’ church-goer dubbed ‘The Innocent One’ by friends 

When Letby’s friends circulated a post on social media inviting people to tag each other as characters from a spoof Mr Men and Little Miss series, they were quick to name her ‘The Innocent One’.

But none could have predicted the terrible irony of that post when, years later their ‘studious’ and ‘goofy’ friend was put on trial and found guilty of the most heinous crimes in modern times.

The fact that Letby was deemed ‘innocent’ and the least likely of her peers to get into trouble, perhaps speaks volumes about her ‘girl-next-door’ persona.

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‘This is a clear mood change, you can feel that change of emotion, it is very rapid when it is within a word itself.’

The lack of consistency in the height of her letters also suggested she has self-esteem issues, while ‘hooks’ at the start of vowels was symbolic of evasiveness, Mr Brand said.

Shaded boxes and grid doodles also signified repressed anger and that she felt trapped, he added. Anger was also evident in the slashes which she used instead of dots to ‘dot her i’s’, he said.

While the ‘overlapping’ of words and sentences symbolised an inability to plan or think clearly, Mr Brand added.

Referring to the back of one of the yellow notes, Mr Brand said: ‘If you look at the doodling that’s going on, it’s quite remarkable. Incredibly heavy, you can see the anger, the anxiety, the stress. Another thing you see is the constant circling – there’s a compulsion in the writing, that compulsiveness you see in another of the sheets where her name is constantly being written, all over the place. 

‘It is full of repetition and compulsion which means there is some disturbances going on. 

‘The trapped feeling of the squares, the anxiety of that, the compulsion of the circles, the fact that the lines overlap, very unclear thinking. No margin, so you can see this person is invasive, you don’t even have to look at the content, from a graphological point of view these things hit you, it says, ‘there is trouble here.’

Speaking of Letby's notes, Mr Brand added: 'Her writing shows she is a charming person who can do some terrible deeds.'

Speaking of Letby’s notes, Mr Brand added: ‘Her writing shows she is a charming person who can do some terrible deeds.’

Mr Brand likened Letby to Jeffrey Dahmer, the US serial killer who murdered and dismembered 17 men over 13 years in Milwaukee, USA

Mr Brand likened Letby to Jeffrey Dahmer, the US serial killer who murdered and dismembered 17 men over 13 years in Milwaukee, USA 

Other features of her handwriting style demonstrated she had dishonest personality traits, Mr Brand said. ‘The other issue that comes through strongly is the fact that her writing is dishonest,’ he added. ‘Letters that look like other letters and missing letters within words themselves. ‘b’s’ that have an open bottom and look more like ‘h’s’ – it is the symbolism, it says, ‘I can’t be bothered.’

‘Then there are little, tiny movements, which are slightly worrying. Such as a ‘shark’s tooth’, which happens when you have an ‘m’ where the final stroke is a ‘c’ shape, that is somebody able to manipulate, abuse and use people. The other one is known as a ‘spoon e,’ that again is an ability to manipulate and use people.

‘Her forms of connection – how you connect letters together – are all so inconsistent.’

Letby’s thread, or the way she joins letters together, indicate cunning, while the angle of her writing suggested someone who could be cold and persistent,’ Mr Brand added.

The arcade or bridge of her letters, for example the way she writes an ‘m’ is also indicative of secrecy or scheming, he said.

But the ‘garlands’ or ‘bowls’ of her handwriting, found in the ‘w’s’ and ‘l’s’, indicated she could be both lazy but also kind, he added.

‘Here we have somebody who occasionally can be very friendly, draw people in and cooperate, at other times she is scheming, secretive, sometimes very cold and at other times quite persistent,’ Mr Brand said.

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